In Mongolia, the unexpected is to be expected. Things that should just work, don’t. What you think will take a short time often takes a long time. And occasionally, something that one expects to take a long time is accomplished quickly and with little fuss.
I make it my policy to meet the husbands of married women who attend Faith Baptist Church as soon as possible. Therefore, I have been trying to meet with Gantsetseg’s husband Erka for many months. It seemed odd to me that she was hesitant to introduce us. But Erka was a strange case. At first, Gantsetseg told me to wait before I met Erka. Then Erka, who is soldier in the Mongolian army, went to Sierra Leone, West Africa as part of a United Nations peacekeeping force. He was gone for many months and only returned to Mongolia after I had departed for my recent furlough.
Upon returning to Mongolia, I again asked Gantsetseg if I could meet with Erka. She said that perhaps she could bring Erka to my house. I thought that it would be easier for me to meet Erka at their house because I have a vehicle and she has two small children. She proposed a Saturday meeting to which I agreed, and then on Saturday she said it would not happen.
That was last Saturday. Wednesday night about 9:30 she called me, “Can you come to my
ger?”
“Yes, I can. What’s up?” I asked.
“I want you to meet Erka,” she replied.
Meeting Erka at night meant a drive in the dark to visit a part of town that I had visited only twice before. “Dark” in Mongolia means something different than “dark” streets in America. “Dark” means no lights at all except occasionally a blinding light as a car with its high-beams on comes down the narrow lane towards you.
Several days of rain had preceded my visit turning all the dirt roads to slick, muddy, puddle-filled paths. I turned into the road that runs along the police academy and was met with an unexpected sight: a large metal pipe had been placed across the road effectively blocking it. While I sat there pondering why the road might be closed several other cars came up behind me. Evidently, the road had only recently been closed, and others were as perplexed by its closure as I was.
I left my car there and set out by foot in the light of the moon. Another Mongolian was walking ahead of me, and I listened for the tell-tale sound of splashing that would mean that he had stepped in a puddle. It was apparent as I walked that the road was closed because the city was preparing to pave it. Gravel had been laid in one section which made walking much easier and safer.
I reached the ‘Y’ in the road. To my right, the road sloped up which was the way that I remembered taking on previous visits. The smell of human waste assaulted my nostrils. Sometimes wet weather overwhelms the outhouses that service these parts of our city.
Several dogs began to bark and sounded particularly vicious. I wondered if they were tied up. Sometimes at night dogs find a way out of the fence. Most Mongolian dogs are trained as guard dogs and would not hesitate to attack people. Several of our church members had been bitten by dogs in an area not far from the one where I was now walking in the dark.
I came to an area with
gers that I recognized as most likely being the area for which I was seeking. Because I could not remember exactly which property was Erka’s I peered through the holes in the fence to see what was inside the fence. I hoped in this way to recognize their
ger. At the same time, I realized that I probably appeared to be a thief to anyone who might be watching me.
The first property did not seem familiar to me. The second did. At the second property, the gate was open almost as if they were expecting company. As I walked toward the gate a particularly nasty sounding hound began to bark. I hesitated. He probably was tied up; if not he could have attacked me already. But still, perhaps he was waiting for me to “invade” his area before pouncing on his hapless victim.
I decided to risk it. After all, I was convinced that God wanted me to visit this family tonight. If I did not believe that, I would not be walking through an unfamiliar part of town with the mud and dogs at 10 P.M.
The dog seemed to stay in his place toward my left as I entered the gate. I was somewhat surprised that no one emerged from the
ger to find out at whom the dog was barking.
The Mongolian way is to simply enter a
ger. It has always seemed awkward to me that one does not knock or call out or somehow announce his presence. If the dog does not attack you, you walk confidently up to the
ger and open the door. Except this time I was not even certain that I was at the correct
ger. After all, I had only visited twice before. I might open the door and find myself staring at a bunch of strangers equally surprised that a foreigner had showed up in their
ger at 10 o’clock.
But God had guided my steps, and I opened the door to discover Gantsetseg, Erka, and their two daughters, Mongozuul and Enkhzuul.
(A quick primer on these names. Gont-set-seg is the wife. Erka’s full name is Erdenesuren, but we call him Erka which is pronounced like the English name Erica except try to say it without the ‘i’ in the middle. You don’t need to remind me of the impossibility of saying the ‘r’ and ‘k’ without a vowel sound in the middle. Mongozuul is the proper transliteration of their older daughter’s name but is pronounced monk-zole. The second syllable is like the English word “soul” but with a ‘z’ instead of an ‘s.’ Enkhzuul’s closest approximation would be ink-zole.)
The problems that they faced were this. They had been together for seven years. For most of those years, they had both been children of wrath, deceiving and being deceived. The wife had become a Christian and now wanted to “start over.” She had confessed all the wrong and sinful things that she had done to her husband which overwhelmed him when he heard them all at once. Instead of increasing his respect for her and her “new religion” her confessions only embittered and angered him.
She had called me to solve these problems. God brought to my mind the quote, “You can’t solve 15 years worth of problems in 15 minutes.” I told them that.
“You have seven years of problems that you want me to solve in one night. I can’t do that.” Like a paramedic doing triage and treating the most serious wounds, I tried to give advice on those issues that were causing the most pain. I made it clear to Erka that he needed Jesus Christ
They seemed to grasp that concept that all their problems would not be solved in a single night, and we agreed to meet the next day. I will now close the curtain of compassion on this sordid mess. All the details do not need to be posted on the Internet for everyone to see.
But the crucial point is this: Erka needs salvation, a change of heart, the Holy Spirit to convict him of sin and guide him to change. I remain convinced that a man cannot be a good husband and a good father without knowing Jesus Christ as his Savior. Gantsetseg needs to see that there is hope for this marriage and also needs to understand that it will be a long, hard, painful road to a Biblical marriage. She must be willing to make changes in attitude and expectation that will allow her to walk that road with joy. Please pray; without God’s intervention there is no hope for this family.
