Praying for missionaries: loving others

If loving God is a missionary’s first priority then loving others is his second. When Jesus was asked what the great commandment in the law was, He responded first, loving God, and next loving our neighbor.

You would think that loving others would be easy for missionaries, after all that is why they went to country X. But it is not that simple. Regardless of a missionary’s field of service he almost invariably will not be among his “own people.” Most definitions of missions include the idea of cross-cultural contact, the idea of a Christian leaving the society and culture which he knows well and ministering in a new culture.

One of the first issues that arises in any cross-cultural contact is misunderstanding, miscommunications, and mis-steps. A brief examination of history will suffice to reveal the broken pieces where two cultures have crashed into each other.

For the missionary a primary adjustment is learning to live and minister within a new culture. A new language to memorize, new cultural taboos, a different system of values—these all confront a missionary with a shock that is sometimes never overcome. (At the same time, meeting a missionary with his poor language skills, unusual practices, and sharply differing ethics is also a shock to the local society; but this essay does not deal with that.)

A missionary have several ways to deal with the culture shock that strikes him when he enters a new culture especially one that is dramatically different than his own.

One response, perhaps the most common response, is to insist on the cultural superiority of his own way. In cases where the missionary comes from a culture that is significantly more powerful such a claim of greatness is enhanced and supported. When missionaries to the Northwest United States met the Nez Perce Indians, they insisted that the indigenous tribes settle down and learn to farm. According to the missionaries such a domesticated lifestyle was far superior than the nomadic society to which the Indians were accustomed. Because the missionaries were from the dominant culture their cultural ways in the end succeeded and today there are very few people who continue the nomadic ways.

Frankly, most missionaries today work in countries where theirs is not such a dominant culture. Their reaction to the shock of a new culture may continue to be to proclaim their cultural superiority. But no one is listening. Unfortunately rather than find ways to accommodate cultural norms that are not addressed in Scripture most missionaries search for ways to criticize the local culture. They may criticize the nationals for being lazy or for lacking in hygiene. They may worry that the food is bad for one’s health. (This is especially ironic coming from American missionaries because the cuisine that much of the world identifies as “American”—the McDonald’s hamburger—is hardly healthy.) They complain that the nationals drive “on the wrong side of the road.” Or they fret that the local children are corrupting their kids.

The effect of their complaints is to drive away the local people. They are soon recognized for a critical spirit that never seems to be satisfied with anything that the nationals do. The nationals perceive that they can never do anything right in the missionary’s eyes.

Sometimes the nationals will conform because they want to be “American.” I am not talking about the change of heart that comes to people whom the Holy Spirit convicts and brings to repentance. I am referring to a superficial change: they may begin to eat with utensils instead of with their hands or they may try to raise their children “the American way.” They are as likely as the missionary to criticize their own people and traditional way of life. The missionary who sees this as an improvement is mistaken. They have not created Christians who imitate Christ, they have created Americanized nationals who imitate Americans.

There are superior cultures, but cultures are superior as they are true to the principles of God’s word. A society that strives for justice is better than a society where bribery and corruption are normal. Families built around a father loving the mother who in turn sees her Scriptural duty clearly is better than a society organized around polygamous marriage. But a culture is not superior simply because it is my culture. Americans in particular need to be aware of those parts of their culture that are blessed by God because we have been faithful to His word and those parts of the culture that are merely preferences, like whether we hold our fork in our right hands or our left (the British way).

Additionally, American missionaries should be particularly sensitive to those unbiblical aspects of American society that are propagating around the world. I once had a Mongolian ask me if most of America was a desert. Surprised, I responded that desert made up a very small part of the American landscape and then asked her the reason she thought America was dominated by desert. She replied that most of the American movies that she had watched took place in the desert.

Most Mongolians identify Americans with the “American culture” that they experience most often: television programming, movies, and music. Those of us who strive for a Biblical approach to entertainment may not realize how evil (at worst) and vapid (at best) American entertainment is. But when most Mongolians associate Americans with Lady Gaga, Brokeback Mountain, and Bill Clinton it is only amazing that they listen to us missionaries at all.

There is another reaction to culture shock: some missionaries withdraw from society. Those of us who have served overseas call this the “missionary compound” response. But it is not unique to missionaries. Those of the U.S. State Department who serve overseas in radically different cultures also tend to congregate in compounds with people of similar cultures. Whole buildings and sub-divisions become filled with Americans, Europeans, amd expatriates. Entire schools are established to educate their children. Restaurants are known as expatriate havens. If the culture is sufficiently shocking, the missionary simply spends the majority of his time with those of a similar culture with whom he feels comfortable. Amy Carmichael saw this effect a century ago when she wrote, “We can never know an Eastern people while we find our chief recreation to be an escape from their companionship into the society of our fellow-Europeans. The people of the land are keenly observant: they mark our preferences in the choice of our friends, as in everything else. If we find our rest and pleasure in being away from them, will they open out to us and let us understand them.” Later in the same book she wrote, “The tendency of English society to keep us apart has been noted again and again by missionaries in every land. ... The company of Europeans keeps a man separate from the people of the land and no one will ever be a good missionary who cannot be happy among them.” (God’s Missionary. Fort Washington, PA: Christian Literature Crusade, 1998, p. 43-44) In my country I have noticed that there are missionaries who know all the other missionaries, and their are missionaries who know many Mongolians. But there are few that know many of both cultures well.

Now to the fundamental statement: one would think that the missionary travels to a new country, finds a fundamentally different society, and just loves the people. But in my experience that is not the norm. You can help by praying that your missionaries truly love the people. Ask God to help them overlook the strange smells, oddly flavored food, and crazy culture. Petition God to point the missionary to the deep needs that the nationals have and to love them.

Whenever I struggle with adjusting to the culture I try to remind myself the adjustment that Jesus had to make. He who was once Creator humbled Himself and became a man. He put up with sinful humans and bickering disciples, hateful religionists and callous politicians to be the perfect sacrifice. Ask God to remind your missionaries of Hebrews 4:15-16: “For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as [we are, yet] without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.”