What God Has Been Teaching Me This Past Month

There are times in one’s life when everything is contingent on someone else’s decision. Because the one awaiting the decision cannot move forward very well without receiving the decision, he or she is partially immobilized waiting for that fateful decision. It is a disconcerting feeling. One wonders what will happen to his plans and his family.

This past month has been that for me. My residency permission expires on May 8. I continue to hear rumors and stories about bureaucratic obstacles to people obtaining visas and residency permission. One friend of mine reported that he saw people being turned away at the airport for lacking proper visas. Last week I received an invitation from the United States Embassy in Mongolia to attend a meeting where new immigration and residency rules will be discussed. A friend’s company is facing closer scrutiny and the threat of forceable closure. Some foreign nationals are required to fill out forms with rather invasive questions (at least questions that seem invasive to Americans). At one point several weeks ago, I despaired of obtaining a renewal of my residency and began to worry.

Then as the Holy Spirit dealt with me, I realized that my despair and worry revealed a lack of faith in God. Either I believed that He was in control, or I did not believe. If I believed that God was in control then there was no purpose in worrying; He would show me step by step and day by day what to do.

At the same time, there were several other temptations to worry that were also occurring. I had been working on a shipment of tools and wood from China. This was part of an overall plan to begin a carpenter shop in Mongolia. In January I traveled to China and picked out the materials that I wanted to buy. There was not time before the Lunar New Year to arrange shipping but after that holiday in February I began to work on the shipping. The earthquake and subsequent tsunami in Japan must have messed up shipping across Asia because I could not get my shipping company to do anything for me the month of March. Here it is April 27, 2011, and the wood is just now being prepared for shipment.

So I called my father who was scheduled to come to help set up the shop. Without the wood and tools there would be no reason for him to come to Mongolia to help me. I explained to him the situation and asked if he wanted to postpone his visit until after the tools arrived. He told me that he felt that they should come now and not wait to visit Mongolia. This was a much more difficult decision than I realized

Though I did not know until my father arrived, he also was facing some severe temptation to worry and fret. My brother, his son, was facing some difficult decisions and potential pressures. My father was torn between staying in the United States to help and counsel my brother and coming to Mongolia to assist me. As he described his situation to me it sounded as if he was facing the same temptations that I was.

Meanwhile, I had been in contact with a new missionary coming to Mongolia for over a year. He was planning to come with his family in mid-May and was hoping that I would be around to assist in his adjustment to Mongolia. I worried about what would happen to him and his family if they came to Mongolia expecting me to be there and I had already left.

Then a friend from China asked if she could visit us during the summer. I wanted to be an encouragement to her but could hardly tell her to come if my family would not be in Mongolia.

At this time also, our co-worker in Mongolia told us that he was considering taking a furlough in July. If our residency permission could not be renewed we would be facing the prospect of abandoning suddenly this fledgling church.

So if I forced to leave Mongolia suddenly in the beginning of May, I would be abandoning my parents, my church, my friends who were depending on me to help them adjust, and the work that I had been seeking to build since 2007. As I said at the beginning I felt as if I were in limbo waiting on other people’s decisions and unable to make decisions of my own.

This was exactly the place where God wanted me to be. In my next post I will tell you the lessons that God wanted me to learn.